Sonnet

Sonnet #18

(a parody)

Shall I compare thee to a bale of hay?

Thou art more dusty and far less neat.

Rough winds do toss thy mop about, I'd say,

Which looks far worse than hay a horse would eat.

Sometime thy squinty eye looks into mine

Through stringy, greasy hair that needs be trimm'd,

And ne'er a horse had such a stench as thine,

As though in stagnant sewers thou hast swimm'd.

Thy disgusting image shall not fade;

This my tortured mind and soul doth know.

O, I should love to hit thee with a spade;

And with that blow I hope that thou wouldst go.

So long as I can breathe, my eyes can see,

And I can run, I'll stay away from thee...

Instructions for the Sonnet 18 parody:

1. Must have 14 lines and use same rhyme scheme, abab cdcd efef gg

2. On lines 1, 5, 9, and 13, must use same words as original sonnet.

3. After making rough draft, copy finished sonnet on blank white paper and illustrate.

Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate.
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer's lease hath all too short a date.
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimmed,
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance or nature's changing course untrimmed;
But thy eternal summer shall not fade
Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st,
Nor shall death brag thou wander'st in his shade
When in eternal lines to time thou grow'st.
So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.